Reasons for obsession with this

Hi! Welcome to the Auto-Fellatio Kingdom Self-Suck Bulletin Board. I hope people will use it make connections and initiate discussions on one of the most pressing topics of our day; solo cock-sucking. If this is your first visit, please read "Guide for newcomers" below. Enjoy! Al Eingang

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blacksunshineaz
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Reasons for obsession with this

Post by blacksunshineaz »

Whether you can do this or are aspiring to, is selfsucking just a kinky way to pleasure yourself or is there a higher meaning for you? I've been obsessed with being able to do this for nearly 30 years and the majority of porn I watch is related to this.

Some may say it's a latent desire to suck another man's penis, but I tried that once and it didn't do anything for me so that can't be it.

Is it the psychological aspect of doing something taboo and what many people think is impossible? Is it because it's the ultimate form of masturbation and you must master your own body to be able to do this?

Is it an exhibitionist thing because you like sharing photos/videos online? Is it a voyeuristic thing because you like watching others do it? Is there a sense of belonging to a special club of like-minded individuals who have also acquired this skill?

I'm curious what your motivation is. I think for me all apply except for the first one. I'm proud of my ability, even though I haven't completely mastered it yet. I've shared it anonymously online and also discretely among certain individuals in my life. I wish I could be more open about it and post photos showing my face but I realize there is risk in me doing that. Some of you aren't bothered by that and I envy that.

I am very appreciative that there is such a community to share our thoughts and images/video about this subject. After years of researching this I have discovered there is a great amount of interest in this and I do believe that a considerably larger portion of the male population is capable of performing this than you might think.

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Shamman
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by Shamman »

Well, I guess I'll go first...

I'd have to say it's been all the things you mentioned and more, for me. At first it was the challenge and the opportunity to get a satisfying blowjob. I thought. But there was also the opportunity to give a blowjob as well. I'd been open to blowing other guys since youth but had only a couple encounters. Being able to selfsuck gave me access to a willing cock. Not easy but available. This became more apparent after being skilled. I realized that I enjoyed the experience of my mouth as much as of my dick. Often it felt as though my throat was cumming even before my cock did.

The 'more' came as I got proficient at it. When I'm completely into it, I lose my sense of 'self' and it becomes almost a spiritual experience. The thought of my semen both leaving my body and simultaneously entering it seems to cause a mental 'loop' that gives a special thrill on its own accord. I may even feel like 'Atom' of the Egyptian mythology - creating a new universe as I cum, consuming myself with ultimate pleasure.

I know I've always had an exibitionist side. My ex and I would experiment (safely) with it and this gave me extra mental thrills in my imagination. Finding an outlet for that here (and on xtube) fulfills this to a small extent. I've even thought about finding a "peep show parlor" where I could display my talent. One time, I was publicly accused of having this talent and a part of me wanted the whole neighborhood to hear, with the hope that someone would be interested enough to approach me about it.

So, it's very complex and there are many 'reasons' I enjoy this. Or enjoyED it. I've put too much padding on in the past couple years, to complete the act for now. Until I lose the 'tire', it's memory and imagination that keeps me going...

Selfsuck28
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by Selfsuck28 »

Same as previous. A lot of things you mentioned ring true.

I was masturbating from a young age and I used to dream about it.
I loved my cock. I loved how it felt, it smelled and I wanted to just lick it, gorge on it. Make love to it.

I never had a desire back then to suck off another cock, I just enjoyed playing with my own, and did so frequently and I guess my bodies natural instincts took over and I wanted to go the next level.

I'm very secretive about it. Nobody really knows I can do it.
I've shown many random people online through webcam I can do it, but I rarely and very, very briefly will show my face- I love to show off that part of me, really when I'm webcamming im watching myself, and the interaction with the other user, stimulates me more.

Over the years my solosucking evoled and I grew to want to suck someone else's cock, I still haven't, but the desire is there, that curious spark. I still love to suck my cock when I can, and learned a way I can twist it round so it is facing me, and sometimes for a brief few minutes imagine I'm sucking someone else- before I get too erect and suck it that way.

For me, I just enjoy masturbstion and lovd my cock for how it is. I get aroused looking at my cock and enjoy it to the full.

I have grown a fetish I think for autofellatio, I enjoy watching them and seeing what others do, always gets me going.

Ideal fantasy would be to have a session with one, or maybe even two other genuine easy going self suckers- that would be fun.

I don't post anything of myself online, but sometimes I've had that urge. Just to take a full on shot and share it, sucking and cumming. Of course I never do, as I don't want my reality to be tarnished by people's hate and ignorance.

Lol.
There is a lot to say on it really.
Not sure I'm explaining it well, but here's a start.

mso_lucky
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by mso_lucky »

My reasons for being obsessed with autofellatio are somewhat summarised in the previous post of “Blacksunshine AZ”, “Shamman”and “Selfsuck28”.

I started to suck myself in 5th grade, at the early age of 10. It was the ultimate form of masturbation for me because I didn't know any other way to pleasure myself. It was only in High School, a couple years later that I first heard of masturbation.

In the 70's and the 80's, people weren't as open as today about sex and a guy sucking a cock was considered a fag with all the negative impacts that it meant at the time (bullying, etc...) When I was in Senior High there was a gay guy in school and other students gave him such a hard time. So sucking myself was something taboo that I didn't talk about but enjoyed privately. But, it's also when I started to think about sucking another man's penis. I too, twisted it around so it would face me, so I could imagine sucking another's, but that remained a fantasy.

Many students knew that I was very limber as a gymnast and during a field trip, some students accused me of having this talent; but I had to deny it because I was afraid that I might have to make a public performance to prove it and by doing so, some might expect me to suck them as well which would give me the bad reputation previously stated. Secretly though, I sometimes thought about what it would have been like to give such a show and maybe give a few blowjob!

When I was in college, I did show my talent to a few girlfriends. One was especially frustrated to know that I didn't depend on her to get a blowjob. If she wasn't in the mood, I could simply give myself one.

I've taken a few pictures of myself but I can't share any because I took those before the numeric age. Back then you had two choices. Taking pictures on film and go to the store to have them printed, which would mean exposing yourself to the employees and risk being judged when going to pick them up or take “polaroids”. I took a few “polaroids” while I sucked myself. Part for the thrill, part just to see what I looked like with a cock in my mouth, part to see a cock being sucked. I kept those in a secret place for a while before I destroyed them when I was afraid my parents would find them.

I too, put too much padding around the waste over the years. So finding Al's website brought me back on memory lane.

Today, my desire to suck another man's penis is due to the fact that I miss having my cock in my mouth. I had a few encounters and although they felt mostly good. They never reached that instant action/reaction of sucking your own.

christopherdmaxwell
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

i am curious as to how mature you appear in the image(s)?-) - i'm certain we all here may have appreciated images and video of youthful indiscretion and by their own volition... - - usually we don't find out until AFTER the images are gone...

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blacksunshineaz
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by blacksunshineaz »

That reminds me, when I was in high school, we were required to take 1 year of gym class so I took it my freshman year. We were assigned lockers alphabetically by last name and this class was also my homeroom so they'd do the school announcements and the pledge of allegiance (did we ever do that nude?) and sat on the bench listening. They guy to the immediate right of me was sort of a bully and was much larger than me and he had grabbed my shoulders and tried pushing me down, saying "stop trying to suck yourself". I am not sure where that came from but I had tried selfsucking two years prior and as far as I know I hadn't revealed that to anybody, unless it was my former best friend who I had masturbated with a few times who was in the class with me, but he was in another row of lockers because of his last name.

I sometimes wonder whether word had gotten out I was interested in selfsucking and had tried it.

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blacksunshineaz
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by blacksunshineaz »

christopherdmaxwell wrote:i am curious as to how mature you appear in the image(s)?-) - i'm certain we all here may have appreciated images and video of youthful indiscretion and by their own volition... - - usually we don't find out until AFTER the images are gone...
I wish I had thought to take photos of myself doing this when I was younger, but that was before digital cameras and of course you wouldn't dare taking photos like that to get developed. We did have a Polaroid instant camera, but it was one of the fold-up models from the 1970's with fake leather and it was impossible to operate with one hand. I didn't dare ask anyone else to assist me. I did attempt to look at myself in a metal lid from a can of butter cookies, which was a lousy mirror. It never occurred to me to try a hand mirror...

christopherdmaxwell
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

i had taken Polaroid pictures of myself.... not selfsucking unfortunately as i was the fat kid growing up... of course the images have since been destroyed...

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blacksunshineaz
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by blacksunshineaz »

I am certain if I had any back then my snooping mom would have found them. I was a good kid but my parents didn't think much of some of my friends and was worried I would try drugs, have sex (yeah right) or worshipped Satan. Seriously. My mom was paranoid. Once a candy wrapper had been stuck to my shoe and fell off onto the floor. My mom found it and accused me of using drugs. WTF?

There were only two things I was addicted to back then, my Nintendo and my cock. Not much of a gamer anymore but my cock is still my #1 obsession. Had my parents knew I wanted to suck my cock I am sure they would have died or shock or sought some kind of intervention because 1) touching yourself is a sin; and 2) I must be gay. Wrong. Fortunately, my sister is the one with all the issues which takes the focus off me for once. It does however make me realized just how oppressed I was. I'm not having children myself but if I were I wouldn't raise them like that. Guilting your kid about anything and everything is not a way to make them want to have a relationship with you.

Sorry about my rant, I just needed to vent!

christopherdmaxwell
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

my quasi-adopted son turns 20 today... i try not to impose anything where he would have some hang-ups, but, he has them... - he's playing games right now and is likely hoping my part time polysomnography job doesn't have patients cancel later today for SOME reason!-) - he finishes off looking at porn via autofellatio... - i wish i could convince him to take and share pics!

MarkVon
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by MarkVon »

christopherdmaxwell wrote:my quasi-adopted son turns 20 today... i try not to impose anything where he would have some hang-ups, but, he has them... - he's playing games right now and is likely hoping my part time polysomnography job doesn't have patients cancel later today for SOME reason!-) - he finishes off looking at porn via autofellatio... - i wish i could convince him to take and share pics!
Your quasi-adopted son admits to performing autofellatio to get off?

christopherdmaxwell
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Location: Houston, TX

Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

actually, he DENIES it, BUT, I have seen it with my own eyes once when he thought i was sleeping - and he even denies THAT! - and then there are some other scenarios where i have observed, but must plead the 5th due to possible ramifications!-)

christopherdmaxwell
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Location: Houston, TX

Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

he FINISHES OFF - meaning he eats his own cum while sucking on his own dick head - only when climaxing.... this only lasts about 10 seconds...

MarkVon
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Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by MarkVon »

christopherdmaxwell wrote:he FINISHES OFF - meaning he eats his own cum while sucking on his own dick head - only when climaxing.... this only lasts about 10 seconds...
Wow, awesome.

christopherdmaxwell
Posts: 219
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Location: Houston, TX

Re: Reasons for obsession with this

Post by christopherdmaxwell »

hmmm... my story on this dissapeared.... perhaps its for the best?

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